( Christmas ) shopping

Why One Wife now chooses to Shop alone.

Here's proof of what can happen when a women drags her highly

disinterested husband or boyfriend alone when shopping.

This letter was sent by a British hypermart to a customer in Oxford:

"Dear Mrs Murray,

While we thank you for your valued patronage and use of our store

loyalty card, the manager of our store is considering banning you and 

your family from shopping with us, unless your husband stop his antics.

 Below is a list of just some of the offences over the past few months,

all verified by our surveillance cameras:

15 Jun: Took 24 boxes of condomes and randomly put them

in people's trolleys when they weren't looking.

2 Jul: Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at five-minutes intervals.

14 Aug: Moved a "Caution-Wet floor" sign to carpeted area.

4 Oct: Looked right into the security camera and used it as mirror

to pick his nose.

3 Dec: Darted around the store suspiciously, loudly 

humming Mission Impossible theme.

18 Dec: Hide in a cloth rack and yelled "pick me, pick me!"

23 Dec:  Went into a fitting room. shut the door, then yelled very loudly:

"there is no toilet paper in here".

Yours sincerrely,

Store manager.

drag                 [ dræg] ciągnąć, wlec
disinterested     [ dɪs`ɪntrəstɪd] niezainteresowany
patronage         [`pætrənɪdʒ] poparcie ,stała klientela

ban                  [ bæn]  zakazywać            

antic                 ['æntɪk] figiel, wybryk
verified             [`verɪfaɪ] sprawdzony
surveillance       [ sə:veɪləns]  nadzorujący, obserwujący
randomly          [' rændəmlɪ ] przypadkowo
housewares      [ hauzweərz] sprzęt AGD
go off               [ gəu of]  włączać się –o budziku
pick                 [ pɪk]  dłubać
dart around      [da:t ə`raund] przesuwać się szybko dookoła
rack                 [ ræk] wieszak, stojak, półka, regał
pick me            [ pɪk mi] wybierz mnie